Cathy’s Birthing Story
Cathy is a FE lecturer and was 31 at the time of Hana’s birth.
“I have two children, Matthew & Hana; Matthew was born in 2006 in hospital and Hana in 2009 at home. During my first pregnancy I attended both NHS & NCT antenatal classes and found my NCT class helped me to feel better informed to make considered decisions and most importantly boosted my confidence that I could give birth naturally. I also listened to natal hypnotherapy CDs during both pregnancies. Matthew was born in hospital in a birthing pool, there were no interventions and although all went basically as planned there were aspects of my care that I wasn’t totally happy with. When Matthew was about 18 months old I started training to become an NCT antenatal teacher myself. The training is fantastic and naturally I have become even better informed about all the many factors that influence birth. When I became pregnant with Hana I wanted a home birth and thankfully the experience of Hana’s birth was entirely positive. I have read many great books but the one I think is particularly helpful and accessible for all is Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (2003)
As my son was born at 38 wks I was convinced baby number 2 would also be early, so as 38 weeks came and went I felt as though I was seriously late and was sure I would end up having to get into debates about induction instead, so had already started to book up visits to reflexologists, acupuncturists etc! However, the day after my due date I spent a normal day pottering about feeling tired and very normal. That evening my Mum phoned at 6.30 to see if it was likely she would be needed (she was going to be in the house while I was in labour to look after my son Matthew) as she was going out ... I confidently told her that if she was going to be needed I thought I would have known about it by now!
After saying goodnight to Matthew around 7pm I got in the bath and after a while I did start to think that my Braxton Hicks were getting quite bad. After the bath the contractions continued with strength and regularity to the point where I did start to wonder if something was underway. I started to time the contractions, which were 3 minutes apart and lasting about a minute ... my husband Jim looked over my shoulder at the timings and suggested I call the midwives but again I was reluctant in case I was wrong! In the end I did call the hospital to get a message to the community midwives just before 8pm as we had planned a home birth and by then I was fairly certain that labour was underway.
As it had come on so suddenly I started to feel panicky and had to really get focused and make myself calm down. I was rocking over the birth ball and felt I was coping well, but it was intense so Jim helped me get the TENS machine on. I had a call from the community midwife, Mary and thankfully there were 2 midwives free to come over - such a relief, as I knew they were massively short staffed at the time with holidays and swine flu dwindling their numbers.
Mary arrived soon after, which was good as I felt that labour was well underway. I was impressed how she read my birth plan thoroughly and talked to me about it - it was clear she was going to follow it to the letter! I asked for a vaginal examination as we didn’t know if it was worth spending the time and energy preparing the birth pool, however although I was 5cm dilated by then she was confident we would have time so Jim started to inflate and fill the pool.
We had managed to get a message to my Mum who was now with us, so she was also able to help out rubbing my back and providing encouragement when Jim was busy with the pool. I started to listen to the backing music from the natal hypnotherapy CDs I had been listening to during pregnancy which gave me something else to focus on. I also think that on reflection it must have triggered all the suggestions I had stored mentally as my labour became increasingly intense. I felt really hot and went out into the conservatory and opened both doors wide out to the garden. By now it was completely dark and raining lightly, I stayed there kneeling over the sofa in the cool darkness and with Jim massaging my back and encouraging me, and intermittently popping back to sort the pool out. Mary came out from time to time to check me and listen to the baby’s heartbeat.
Around about 10.30 I was struggling to feel like I could keep it together and also thought that I might be getting pushing feelings. I felt that I couldn’t move from where I was, but it was much too cold for a baby out there and I was helped back into the lounge. Mary said it was going to be too late for the pool so we stuck some pillows on the birth ball and the floor around it, the floor covered with plastic sheets and old towels. I was starting to feel really overwhelmed by how intense it was, and had the classic feelings that I had had enough and couldn’t do it - I’d rather go to bed for a few hours etc! I knew this was transition but it didn’t make the feelings any less real.
I started pushing - and soon remembered just how much hard work it is! Although still incredibly hard work, it was better than Matthew’s birth - this time I pushed when I felt it coming on - not when I was told to! Mary was clear about just following my body, so when there was a break I just thought “rest and be thankful” - and I did! I hardly dared asked how things were progressing as I didn’t want to hear that baby was still a long way off, but I did ask her to tell me when baby would soon be arriving so I could take my dress off ready for skin to skin contact ... so I was pleased to be told to do it straight way! It was so intense, but now writing this I know that I can’t quite recapture that feeling, it is so soon forgotten but it is as though your body is completely taken over by the force of labour, it’s so overwhelming and incredibly hard; however to focus on the fact it will end and that there will be a baby at the end does make it more bearable! Jim was great, encouraging me and holding the base of my back to I could push against him with every contraction.
Just as I felt like I was tearing in half as the head was crowning, the second midwife Doreen arrived. She rushed straight over, looked me straight in the eyes and grabbed my hands. I was breathing really fast - Mary and Doreen kept telling me to slow down and with Doreen panting with me I did manage to slow down and pant as the head came out. Once I heard the head was out I felt a massive sense of relief and then with the next push the whole body slithered out at 10.55pm. Mary passed her through my legs and asked me what we had... I looked and was so delighted to see we had a beautiful, healthy baby girl! I held her straight to my chest, overwhelmed with the feelings of relief and joy.
We looked at our wonderful daughter, Hana Jasmine - she was so alert and looked at us with her beautiful bright eyes. My Mum had been sitting on the stairs and I called her to come in and see her. It was such an intense emotional time, but also felt so calm and natural. I cuddled Hana and offered her my breast and after a while, to my amazement she latched on straight away - so clever, that innate ability.
Jim and I had been worried about the 3rd stage, having had a fairly traumatic experience last time, and I had opted for a delayed but managed 3rd stage. Again the midwives impressed me with their attention to my birth plan, they discussed the cord and having checked it had stopped pulsating and was flaccid they clamped it and Jim cut it. I expected to be given syntometrine then but they calmly suggested we would just wait and see, the cord was lengthening so the placenta was starting to separate of its own accord. They suggested squatting and pushing to see if it would come out but it didn’t happen. I tried for a while and was getting a bit frustrated as I just wanted it over so I could focus on Hana, however there was no sense of panic and they suggested I just spend longer cuddling and feeding her.
After a while contractions picked up again, which were surprisingly painful and intense. I passed Hana to Jim who held her, while also using his hand to push against my stomach to encourage the placenta out. With a surprising amount of effort, I finally pushed the placenta out after about 45minutes of trying! The midwives took blood from the placenta immediately, again sticking closely to my birth plan as I’m Rhesus negative and needed her blood to be checked (as a delay last time meant blood had to be taken from Matthew’s hand rather than the placenta, which had been awful). They checked Hana and weighed her - 9lbs 1oz! I couldn’t believe it, and was sure I must have torn badly, it had been so painful and she was so big. Mary examined me and said there was just a small tear, no need for stitches - I was amazed. It still seems unbelievable, the effect of good advice and support I suppose.
After a bit of clearing up the midwives left, Mum went to bed and Jim and I sat there with Hana, music still playing and had a cup of tea. I think that was when I realised the real value of a home birth, I felt completely calm, happy and peaceful. Soon after I had a bath then got into my own bed around 1.30am. I lay there for hours, far too excited to sleep but just staring at Hana and marvelling at how well everything had gone.
At around 7am Matthew woke up and came in to our bed to meet his much wanted little sister and for us all to have a cuddle as a family of four. I recovered incredibly well and felt completely different, physically and mentally after this birth. It is wonderful to reflect on this birth and truly feel that it could not have gone better.”
Cathy is a FE lecturer and was 31 at the time of Hana’s birth.
“I have two children, Matthew & Hana; Matthew was born in 2006 in hospital and Hana in 2009 at home. During my first pregnancy I attended both NHS & NCT antenatal classes and found my NCT class helped me to feel better informed to make considered decisions and most importantly boosted my confidence that I could give birth naturally. I also listened to natal hypnotherapy CDs during both pregnancies. Matthew was born in hospital in a birthing pool, there were no interventions and although all went basically as planned there were aspects of my care that I wasn’t totally happy with. When Matthew was about 18 months old I started training to become an NCT antenatal teacher myself. The training is fantastic and naturally I have become even better informed about all the many factors that influence birth. When I became pregnant with Hana I wanted a home birth and thankfully the experience of Hana’s birth was entirely positive. I have read many great books but the one I think is particularly helpful and accessible for all is Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (2003)
As my son was born at 38 wks I was convinced baby number 2 would also be early, so as 38 weeks came and went I felt as though I was seriously late and was sure I would end up having to get into debates about induction instead, so had already started to book up visits to reflexologists, acupuncturists etc! However, the day after my due date I spent a normal day pottering about feeling tired and very normal. That evening my Mum phoned at 6.30 to see if it was likely she would be needed (she was going to be in the house while I was in labour to look after my son Matthew) as she was going out ... I confidently told her that if she was going to be needed I thought I would have known about it by now!
After saying goodnight to Matthew around 7pm I got in the bath and after a while I did start to think that my Braxton Hicks were getting quite bad. After the bath the contractions continued with strength and regularity to the point where I did start to wonder if something was underway. I started to time the contractions, which were 3 minutes apart and lasting about a minute ... my husband Jim looked over my shoulder at the timings and suggested I call the midwives but again I was reluctant in case I was wrong! In the end I did call the hospital to get a message to the community midwives just before 8pm as we had planned a home birth and by then I was fairly certain that labour was underway.
As it had come on so suddenly I started to feel panicky and had to really get focused and make myself calm down. I was rocking over the birth ball and felt I was coping well, but it was intense so Jim helped me get the TENS machine on. I had a call from the community midwife, Mary and thankfully there were 2 midwives free to come over - such a relief, as I knew they were massively short staffed at the time with holidays and swine flu dwindling their numbers.
Mary arrived soon after, which was good as I felt that labour was well underway. I was impressed how she read my birth plan thoroughly and talked to me about it - it was clear she was going to follow it to the letter! I asked for a vaginal examination as we didn’t know if it was worth spending the time and energy preparing the birth pool, however although I was 5cm dilated by then she was confident we would have time so Jim started to inflate and fill the pool.
We had managed to get a message to my Mum who was now with us, so she was also able to help out rubbing my back and providing encouragement when Jim was busy with the pool. I started to listen to the backing music from the natal hypnotherapy CDs I had been listening to during pregnancy which gave me something else to focus on. I also think that on reflection it must have triggered all the suggestions I had stored mentally as my labour became increasingly intense. I felt really hot and went out into the conservatory and opened both doors wide out to the garden. By now it was completely dark and raining lightly, I stayed there kneeling over the sofa in the cool darkness and with Jim massaging my back and encouraging me, and intermittently popping back to sort the pool out. Mary came out from time to time to check me and listen to the baby’s heartbeat.
Around about 10.30 I was struggling to feel like I could keep it together and also thought that I might be getting pushing feelings. I felt that I couldn’t move from where I was, but it was much too cold for a baby out there and I was helped back into the lounge. Mary said it was going to be too late for the pool so we stuck some pillows on the birth ball and the floor around it, the floor covered with plastic sheets and old towels. I was starting to feel really overwhelmed by how intense it was, and had the classic feelings that I had had enough and couldn’t do it - I’d rather go to bed for a few hours etc! I knew this was transition but it didn’t make the feelings any less real.
I started pushing - and soon remembered just how much hard work it is! Although still incredibly hard work, it was better than Matthew’s birth - this time I pushed when I felt it coming on - not when I was told to! Mary was clear about just following my body, so when there was a break I just thought “rest and be thankful” - and I did! I hardly dared asked how things were progressing as I didn’t want to hear that baby was still a long way off, but I did ask her to tell me when baby would soon be arriving so I could take my dress off ready for skin to skin contact ... so I was pleased to be told to do it straight way! It was so intense, but now writing this I know that I can’t quite recapture that feeling, it is so soon forgotten but it is as though your body is completely taken over by the force of labour, it’s so overwhelming and incredibly hard; however to focus on the fact it will end and that there will be a baby at the end does make it more bearable! Jim was great, encouraging me and holding the base of my back to I could push against him with every contraction.
Just as I felt like I was tearing in half as the head was crowning, the second midwife Doreen arrived. She rushed straight over, looked me straight in the eyes and grabbed my hands. I was breathing really fast - Mary and Doreen kept telling me to slow down and with Doreen panting with me I did manage to slow down and pant as the head came out. Once I heard the head was out I felt a massive sense of relief and then with the next push the whole body slithered out at 10.55pm. Mary passed her through my legs and asked me what we had... I looked and was so delighted to see we had a beautiful, healthy baby girl! I held her straight to my chest, overwhelmed with the feelings of relief and joy.
We looked at our wonderful daughter, Hana Jasmine - she was so alert and looked at us with her beautiful bright eyes. My Mum had been sitting on the stairs and I called her to come in and see her. It was such an intense emotional time, but also felt so calm and natural. I cuddled Hana and offered her my breast and after a while, to my amazement she latched on straight away - so clever, that innate ability.
Jim and I had been worried about the 3rd stage, having had a fairly traumatic experience last time, and I had opted for a delayed but managed 3rd stage. Again the midwives impressed me with their attention to my birth plan, they discussed the cord and having checked it had stopped pulsating and was flaccid they clamped it and Jim cut it. I expected to be given syntometrine then but they calmly suggested we would just wait and see, the cord was lengthening so the placenta was starting to separate of its own accord. They suggested squatting and pushing to see if it would come out but it didn’t happen. I tried for a while and was getting a bit frustrated as I just wanted it over so I could focus on Hana, however there was no sense of panic and they suggested I just spend longer cuddling and feeding her.
After a while contractions picked up again, which were surprisingly painful and intense. I passed Hana to Jim who held her, while also using his hand to push against my stomach to encourage the placenta out. With a surprising amount of effort, I finally pushed the placenta out after about 45minutes of trying! The midwives took blood from the placenta immediately, again sticking closely to my birth plan as I’m Rhesus negative and needed her blood to be checked (as a delay last time meant blood had to be taken from Matthew’s hand rather than the placenta, which had been awful). They checked Hana and weighed her - 9lbs 1oz! I couldn’t believe it, and was sure I must have torn badly, it had been so painful and she was so big. Mary examined me and said there was just a small tear, no need for stitches - I was amazed. It still seems unbelievable, the effect of good advice and support I suppose.
After a bit of clearing up the midwives left, Mum went to bed and Jim and I sat there with Hana, music still playing and had a cup of tea. I think that was when I realised the real value of a home birth, I felt completely calm, happy and peaceful. Soon after I had a bath then got into my own bed around 1.30am. I lay there for hours, far too excited to sleep but just staring at Hana and marvelling at how well everything had gone.
At around 7am Matthew woke up and came in to our bed to meet his much wanted little sister and for us all to have a cuddle as a family of four. I recovered incredibly well and felt completely different, physically and mentally after this birth. It is wonderful to reflect on this birth and truly feel that it could not have gone better.”
© 2010 Amy Marner
